Arts & Entertainment

News Crew listens to blue tunes

by tess brewer, staff writer
Photo Courtesy of Cnet.com

Left to our own devices and neurosis, 2020 was a year of in-home escapism. For the tumultuous mental state, no better remedy exists than that of artistic consumption. 

Thanks to the rise of music streaming services, we have a way to delve into the individual psyche, a tool colloquially known as “Spotify Wrapped.” 

A few brave Newswirans opened up their playlists to be psychoanalyzed by a non-certified psychology major. I do not claim to know what I’m talking about, which is an understanding in the field of psychoanalysis. 

The names herein have been changed to personality types to protect anonymity (and enhance relatability).  

The Sedate Sad Boy

Top 5 Songs:

“Self Control”

“Na Fr”

“Solo”

“Reality Check”

“All I Need”

Top 5 Artists: 

Frank Ocean

MIKE

Earl Sweatshirt

Noname

Medhane

You’re very poetic, and you cry a bit more than the average Frank Ocean listener. You weren’t exposed to secondhand smoke at a young age, but you were exposed to Eeyore the donkey, and you know now that if Eeyore had opposable thumbs, he would probably be a smoker. 

Your fantasies about running away to start a bucket hat shop with Earl Sweatshirt are dangerously far-fetched.

The Obsessive Sweetie

Top 5 Songs:

“Thunder Road”

“I See the Light”

“Teardrops On My Guitar”

“Ordinary Girl” 

“We’re All in This Together”

Photo Courtesy of Creative Commons

Top 5 Artists: 

Taylor Swift 

Benny Martin 

Bruce Springsteen 

The Cast of HSM

Fred Mollin

You try to go to your happy place often, but this finds you trying to relive glory days — this might bring on a full blown quarter-life crisis if you aren’t careful. 

The High School Musical Soundtrack interspersed with Folklore is very telling of this. You are very comfortable in your current state, but your maturity may be stuck in the latent period. 

The Chaotic Sardonic 

Top 5 Songs:

“Blinding Lights” 

“All of the Lights” 

“Empire State of Mind” 

“Spikes” 

“A Real Hero” 

Photo Courtesy of Creative Commons

Top 5 Artists: 

Death Grips 

Kanye West 

Beastie Boys 

Kendrick Lamar 

Tyler, The Creator

A full blown case of the Id. You were the type to bite kids on the playground. If Kanye, Kendrick and Tyler weren’t enough, Death Grips as your top artist displays that you were exposed to far too much loud, grinding noise as an infant. 

Perhaps your mother ran the garbage disposal too much? 

The Repentant Emo

Top 5 Songs:

“Kathy’s Song”

“Saw You in a Dream” 

“Slow Dancing in the Dark”

“Instant Crush” 

“January” 

Top 5 Artists: 

Joji

Young the Giant 

Twenty One Pilots 

Hozier 

Cavetown

The fact that Joji’s undereye bags haunt your dreams is indicative of an unconscious desire to return to the emo state. This desire makes itself obvious in the addition of Twenty One Pilots to your top artist list. 

However, you are growing. Hozier makes an appearance, as well as the quintessential Simon and Garfunkel. I am fully confident that there is hope for you yet. 

The Melancholy Gamer 

Top 5 Songs:

“Every Little Thing” 

“Italo Disco”

“Horsey” 

“How To Build A Relationship”

“Freaks” 

Top 5 Artists: 

Tyler, The Creator

JPEGMAFIA

Denzel Curry 

Madlib

Joey Bada$$

You drift between sessions of introspective dejection and lo-fi flippancy. You still haven’t gotten over when your mom sold your Pokemon cards, and you long for the days when you could just wear the same shirt to school everyday. 

With Tyler as your top artist, it’s obvious you harbor some discontent; Madlib shows that you have a soft core in the end.

My final consensus, after exploring the select musical tastes of the Newswire, is one universal truth: you could all use a hug. 

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