Swifty millipedes, Israeli nuclear facilities

• Texas state troopers have been instructed to “slim down” or face consequences. The report states that troopers with waist sizes over 40 inches will need to track and report weight loss efforts (April 18).

• Israel’s top-secret, state-of-the-art nuclear facility is under assault from porcupines. The small creatures set up near the facility and have been digging under the building, causing concerns (April 19).

• A new species of millipedes has been named after Taylor Swift. The species has been dubbed Nannaria swiftae, or in common vernacular, Swift Twisted-Claw Millipede (April 20).

• A Maryland man has been found dead from  “snake envenomation.” Police found 124 snakes in his home (April 13).