Weenie without a weiner, cat marriage

by ethan nichols, u.s. & world news editor

An Illinois man has been hospitalized after shooting own weiner.

An Illinois man shot  his own weiner after robbing a hot dog stand. While attempting to flee the scene, the man tried to secure his firearm at his waist, but the gun misfired, maiming himself in his loin(s) (April 25).

A Florida sheriff is encouraging people to shoot burglars to “save the taxpayers money.” The sheriff invited a homeowner who shot at a would-be robber to attend a gun safety course to “learn to shoot a lot better,” (April 26).

A British woman has married her cat in an effort to prevent her landlord from separating them. She claims previous landlords have threatened eviction if she didn’t get rid of her pets, so now she’s proving her love and commitment by tying the knot (April 25).  

In a gravity-defying act, an Iraqi man has stacked a record-breaking seven M&M’s on top of each other, breaking the previous Guiness world record of six (April 25).