By Joe Reardon, Newswire Intern 

As Christmas approaches, I’m prepared to hear my least favorite question over and over again: “What do you want for Christmas?” The only answer I can give is: “I don’t know.”

As a kid, this was never an issue. The moment the Christmas catalogs arrived, I was already circling toys I wanted with bold red ink, imagining the joy of tearing through the wrapping paper. There was clarity and a certain magic to the anticipation process. 

But as I grow older, the magic fades, and the certainty I once had about my desires is replaced by indecision, apathy or simply not knowing what I want or need anymore.

At first glance, the problem of not knowing what you want for Christmas might seem trivial. After all, there are worse dilemmas to face: politics, health concerns and existential worries about the future. Within the context of our consumer-driven holiday, it highlights an increasingly common struggle: a lack of direction and personal desire in a world overflowing with options. It’s no longer just about receiving something we’d like, but about navigating a sea of possibilities and managing our ever-expanding expectations.

Why do I feel this way? I would argue that the problem lies in the overwhelming number of options available to us in our consumerist society. The sheer volume of products on the market today, thanks to online shopping and globalized supply chains, means we’re constantly bombarded with choices. While this abundance seems like an opportunity for discovery, it can often be paralyzing. How can we know what we truly want when there are endless items to consider, each vying for our attention?

Research in behavioral economics points to a phenomenon called “the paradox of choice,” in which an excess of options actually leads to less satisfaction. When confronted with too many choices, our decision-making process becomes more difficult and anxiety-inducing, often leading us to choose nothing at all. It’s a feeling that I always experience when asked for my Christmas wish list: the pressure of selecting the perfect gift amid a dizzying array of possibilities leaves me overwhelmed and unsure.

Another aspect of the gift-giving process that contributes to my dilemma is the expectation of gratitude. In a world where consumerism reigns supreme, the act of receiving gifts is often tied to social expectations — everyone wants to seem thoughtful and appreciative. But what happens when we truly don’t know what we want or need? Should I feel guilty for not having a concrete answer when asked what I want?

The pressure to appear satisfied with whatever is given can be exhausting. It creates a performative aspect of holiday gifting, where gratitude is expected to flow freely, regardless of whether the gift truly resonates. This leads to the uncomfortable cycle of politely receiving things I don’t need or won’t use while simultaneously feeling guilty about not having more specific desires.

So, how can we break out of this cycle of indecision? First, we must acknowledge that it’s okay to not know. We don’t always need to have our desires figured out, and the absence of a concrete wish list is, in itself, a reminder that there are more important things than material possessions. Rather than stressing over what to ask for, we could lean into the joy of the moment and the connections we share with loved ones. It’s not always about the gift itself, but the gesture, the thought and the time spent together that truly matter.