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Video games have been constantly evolving over the last 50 years. Some have become beloved artistic masterpieces while others are weird games that some wish to forget about. I know you have plenty of more productive things to do, like homework, but playing these games is so much more entertaining.
Icarus Proudbottom & The Curse of the Chocolate Fountain
Don’t be fooled by the name of this game. There is no chocolate. However, there is plenty of human excrement. This crappy game was released in 2013. The story follows Icarus Proudbottom and his journey through the skies. One morning he wakes up releasing a never ending stream of excrement, and can be thrown through the air at hypersonic speed. On this journey he meets a magical bird that can turn into a katana. He uses “blood destiny” to fight off birds, geese, Neo-Nazis and a helicopter piloted by former president Barack Obama. This obviously has all the important aspects of an amazing video game. Adventure, fighting, villains and Barack Obama. This game is my absolute favorite on the list.
5/5 would play again
Shaq-Fu is one of my personal favorites on this list. This disastrous and comical game was released in 1994, the golden age of Shaq. The famous basketball player Shaquille O’Neal is transported to another dimension where he is supposed to save a boy using, as you may have guessed, Kung-Fu. If the glorious name hasn’t piqued your interest, the game came with Shaq’s second rap album when it was first released. You know a video game is good when there is an entire online movement to buy all of the copies and destroy them. If you want to join the fight, you can visit the Shaq-Fu Liberation Front website: ShaqFu.com.
Have no fear, Shaq-Fu 2 is here. If you have trouble finding the original, there is a mobile and console version of Shaq-Fu: A Legend Reborn. To save yourself from embarrassment, I would recommend not telling your friends that you have a soft spot for Shaq-Fu.
2/5 would play again
Who’s Your Daddy
Having baby fever? Play this game, which was released in 2015. You have two player choices: the dad and the baby. As the dad, the objective is to prevent the uncertain death of your infant. To make it better, your baby may try to put a fork in a electric outlet, microwave itself, drink cleaning products or scuba dive in the tub. If playing the baby, you perform various tasks trying to cause the death of your character. This game has two sides of the spectrum: saving babies and killing babies. If you can’t save this baby, maybe reconsider having a real baby. If you want to kill babies get counseling. Schedule an appointment at the Sycamore House 513-745-3531.
3/5 would play again
Seaman is the perfect game for a cramped college student yearning for a pet. This is the probably the most disturbing on the list. It was released in 1999. The goal of the game is to keep your beloved pet alive. Your pet has the majestic body of a fish and the face of a human. Seaman requires daily attention or he might die, just like a significant other. Your fish can even evolve throughout the game. It may make insulting comments or criticize you. Also like a significant other.
Since Valentine’s Day has recently passed, Seaman can be a great replacement for those without Valentines this year.
2.5/5 would play again
By: Sierra Ross | Staff Writer