Alright buckaroos buckle your seatbelts, because Avengers Endgame is going to be here at the end of the month and I’ve got some spoilers for you. Maybe you’ve already heard of them.
Antman is going to shrink down, go up Thanos’s butt and then rapidly expand, killing him instantly. I believe that everyone already knows this. It’s hardly a spoiler at this point since it just makes too much sense. I think even the directors, the Russo brothers, said, “This is exactly what will happen. The question is how we are going to build up three hours’ worth of runtime to make that event fun to watch.”
So how are they going to fill up those three hours? I’ve got a few ideas. The first thing they’re going to do is figure out how to stop the big snap from happening, so they’ll have to devise a way to go back to right before the snap and cut off Thanos’s fingers, which will prevent him from snapping, thus saving exactly half of the universe.
But they accidentally cut off Thanos’s fingers immediately AFTER he snaps, which causes half the universe to die anyways AND they can’t reuse the gauntlet to save all of their friends (and the rest of the people who died in the snap). They are forced to go back in time AGAIN to help themselves get to Thanos faster in order to, again, save half of the universe.
This is where Marvel’s recent acquisition of 21st Century Fox comes in. Deadpool turns out to be the only person who is able to help the Avengers get to Thanos fast enough because of his ability to talk directly to the audience. But he keeps getting distracted and they start failing over and over again. But then Captain America gets an idea that will help them convince Deadpool to get to Thanos. They have to kill him in a way that would not only make the most sense to Deadpool, but could quite possibly entertain him enough so that he would never interfere with anything ever again.
And then the greatest scene in the history of film will play out. And you can’t prove me wrong until it comes out anyway.
By: Jack Dunn | Jedi Knight