Trump slandered! Rubio = mean girl

By: Jonathan Hogue ~Crab Rangoon Connoisseur~

Florida Senator Marco Rubio swept the second Super Tuesday elections by carrying Florida, Ohio and Illinois to become the Republican Party’s leading candidate.

Prior to Tuesday’s vote, Rubio told the Associated Press about a dream that has plagued several candidates on the campaign trail.

“I had the worst dream that people believed a wall could be constructed along the U.S. border, and Mexico would pay for it,” Rubio said to AP reporters.

He said voters oddly believed these claims and fought protesters at rallies who argued otherwise.

“I also dreamt Donald Trump argued that his penis was the biggest in the Republican Party, but we all knew that rhetoric would not be allowed in a presidential election,” Rubio comically said to the reporters.

In a series of admissions, several candidates reported odd dreams about Donald Trump running for president.

“In the worst dream, I envisioned Trump supporters calling me a pussy and him winning an election after saying the crude remark,” Cruz told NBC News.

Hillary Clinton recanted a similar dream.

“I just beat Senator Sanders and had a vision of Donald Trump making fun of me by using a barking dog to engage swing voters. This obviously doesn’t fly in the United States.”

When asked about candidates’ visions, Trump scoffed at the ideas of a presidential campaign.

“I’m quite comfortable with my work at Trump Tower and believe the White House doesn’t need my leadership. I hope to foster new relationships with Latin American and Middle Eastern investors in order to encourage growth in marginalized communities around the world. Investing in underserved parts of the world and bridging divides is the new goal of my life,” Trump said to AP reporters.

Tomorrow, Trump travels to Mexico to speak with leaders about investment strategies for his businesses.

The organization is working with majority Latino populations in order to break down misconceptions about these communities.

All the candidates said their dreams were a farce and don’t believe these vision reflect their feelings about the American people.

“We believe the American people are smart and honest folks. The Donald Trump talked about in candidates’ dreams is not the Donald we know today. It’s only a dream and takes away from substantive debate. Let’s focus on real leadership,” Sanders said.