Back Page 3/15/23

The Real Plot Summary

By Carter Roos, Staff Writer

Titanic, a movie that holds an influential, must-see status for 25 years now. But, has it become so influential that you do not have to see it at all to get the experience? To prove that there isn’t actually any need to watch Titanic, I, someone who has never seen the movie, will be providing a fully complete and 100% accurate plot summary based only on the information I have gleaned from pop culture.

The movie follows two primary plots: the sinking of the ship itself and, more primarily, the love triangle among three passengers. 

The three characters you need to know for the explanation of our love triangle are Jack, a young passenger aboard the ship, his girlfriend and primary love interest Rose and an older wealthy woman who is almost certainly named Opal, because Opal is the only name directors seem to find appropriate for older women–– or hookers.

At the beginning of the movie, Jack and Rose board the ship together as a couple–– excited to be among the first passengers of the great unsinkable ship. However, the young couple is not wealthy like the other elite passengers of the ship, and Jack is painfully aware, and embarrassed, of his economic status.

This provides an opportunity for Opal’s character to be introduced. Not content in her marriage, the wealthy older woman notices Jack’s youth and avarice and takes an interest in him. Opal entices Jack into a physical relationship by promising to leave him her estate when she passes away. 

Jack, conflicted because of his love for Rose, eventually allows his greed to get the better of him, and agrees to Opal’s proposal, and the two begin to spend more time together as the ship’s journey continues. 

However, the ship is not destined to reach its destination. As it becomes clear to the passengers that the ship will sink, Jack begins to regret what he has done. As the ship sinks, it becomes obvious to him that the material gain forcing him to give up the sanctity of his relationship means nothing in death.

While the wreckage of the ship settles, Jack gets one last moment with his true love, Rose. He professes his love for her and apologizes for everything he did with Opal. As the movie’s final scene closes, Jack heroically gives up holding onto the piece of wood keeping them afloat (that was clearly far too small for two people), sacrificing his own life so that Rose might have a chance to survive.

Comic by Brian Dunn

Would Jack have fit? The world may never know.