What is the matter with depression?

By: Sara Ringenbach ~Staff Columnist~ The tired narrative of a patient, overcast with mood and no chance for sunshine today. Parked in a polyester chair, waiting for a summoning. Eyes looking ahead, but sight too preoccupied with scenery of the mind. A name is called, it is claimed. Walk through the threshold into a hallway decorated with doors on either side until steered into the correct room. Sit on the couch, the operating table of the psyche. A sterile silence. “So, what brings you in today?” Doctor asks. “I’m not feeling like myself.” Patient speaks using voice within, but sounds … Continue reading What is the matter with depression?

Advice: Be the fisherman

By: Sara Ringenbach People say in dating, men are the fishermen and women are the fish. Well, I am no fish, and ladies, you don’t have to live your life being pre-sushi either. People say that if women are more dominant in dating, they will usurp the conventional masculine role which will create a rift in the biological genome that has dictated evolutionary mating methods over millennia. However, if biotechnology can advance enough to 3D print organs and perform face transplants, I think a girl can make the first move without wiping the future of our species into extinction. Yes, … Continue reading Advice: Be the fisherman

‘Real Housewives’ announces new locations

By: Sara Ringenbach ~Staff Writer~ “You low-down monkey with a wig on” “Close your legs to married men!” “Who gonna check me, boo?” “Prostitution whore!” A franchise marked by table flipping, weave pulling and cancer faking, Bravo’s “The Real Housewives” will be welcoming two new cities to the franchise, Potomac and Dallas. “If you haven’t heard of Potomac, that’s fine…(B)ecause that means we’ve done a great job of keeping it a nice little secret,” new Potomac Housewife Gizelle Bryant said in Bravo’s trailer premiere. Bravo sheds light on this elusive city in its official statement. “Located just up the river … Continue reading ‘Real Housewives’ announces new locations