By: Camry Hogue ~18 years off the assembly line~

Hello, folks. My name is Camry Hogue, and I’ve been off the assembly line for 18 years. During the last two years of my life, I’ve experienced a lot with the Hogue family. While I think most of them are batshit crazy, I’ve come to admire their outlook on life. It’s caused me to think things through as well. If you let me, I’d like to tell you something.

People: Worry more about yourself than others. Just the other day I was at an intersection with a Subaru and a Jeep Grand Cherokee. You’d think the cars would be letting out the fumes, but our owners were the ones putting a hole in the ozone layer. Jonathan is too lazy to ride his bike from Wayland Avenue to campus, so I usually see a lot of you during the drive. Most of you seem happy, but others seem like classes were making them sweat more than a hoe in church.

I comprehend that most of you just want a break. When Jonathan drives around on the weekends I usually see girls stumbling in their heels, Xavier guys attempting to be frat bros and Norwood cops angry that their careers on the force will be filled with writing tickets for drunken kids. I understand the need to be young, wild and free. I heard the song enough on my radio; however, don’t be afraid to be yourselves and say when enough is enough.

There have been times when my wheels just wouldn’t turn anymore. I was fully gassed, but my engine wasn’t in the journey. There have been numerous times I’ve seen Jonathan park in the lot before a class and just turn back around to nap because he could do that if he wanted to. We’re not shirking our responsibilities but respecting our limitations. A good nap is better than class sometimes.

If you don’t take anything from my article, I won’t spring an oil leak because of it. I’ve seen a lot during my 18 years and just want to offer advice when I can. Also, if you just agreed with anything I’ve said, I’m happy to hear that. Although I do worry about you because you just agreed with the logic of a car, but whatever. Happy to help when I can!