Features: “The Culture of Skipping Class” and Horoscopes – 1/31/18

For some, skipping class feels like a nice, lazy cup of tea: warm, comforting and consumed in bed. For others, we’d rather have a heart attack and get it over with than skip class and spend the rest of the afternoon stress typing an apology note longer than the essay that was due that day. Take a look at how students and professors feel about the controversial topic.

Tyler Gilkey, sophomore psychology major

“Skipping class is kinda like eating at Skyline. At first it seems like a great idea, but soon enough you start to regret it.”

Dr. Winkelmann, professor, English Department

“I try not to do it too often. (Just kidding!)”

Professor Margaret Martin, Intensive English, Classics and Modern Languages Department

“The past is history and the future is a mystery, but your presence is a gift. Are you gonna come to this party empty-handed?”

Sierra Ross, first-year computer science and physics engineering double major

“‘Are you in this class?’ My professor said after I missed so much class (due to an injury) that my professor didn’t recognize me. As nice as it is to be in bed while everyone else is in class, I wouldn’t recommend it.”

Ariana Lucero, sophomore criminal justice major

“I skip my class in Elet just because I don’t want to climb those torturous steps.”

Dr. Prewitt-Davis, Professor, Theology Department

“Skipping class is like going through a drive through, placing an order, paying and then driving off before you receive your food.”

Sam Haas, sophomore psychology major

“I’m still deciding if I’m gonna go to class (it’s currently 11:31a.m.)”

Evana Dias, sophomore business major

“I skipped class to study for another class. What is college?”

Dr. Gerberry, Assistant Professor, Department of Mathematics

“Hi Professor! I can’t come to class today because I have a hang nail. Will I miss anything today?!” Me: “Um, no, you won’t miss a thing. We plan to meet in the classroom and sing songs together and hold hands for the ENTIRE 50 minutes! Eye roll.”

Dr. Rasmussen, Assistant Professor, Communication Department

“Students skipping…Awesome, it’s one less thing to grade. Just give ‘em an F. Is that mean? I say that all the time, but I’m totally joking. Students will look at me like, whaaaat? Serious?”

Brittany Wells, sophomore Staff Writer

“I’ve skipped class twice in my life. The first week of class freshman year I skipped all of my Tuesday classes thinking “TH” just stood for Thursday. The second time was to study for a Latin exam, and I felt so guilty afterwards that I wrote the professor an apology that includes the sentence: “I’ve felt bad all weekend about skipping your class on Thursday because I genuinely love that class and respect you and the content so much.” Probably would have been less painful to just take the L in my Latin class.”

Professor Lesley Roth, Montessori Teacher Education Program Director

“I was teaching an early morning class a few years ago, and due to a set of morning misfortunes, ran late for class and past the dreaded 10 minute time when most students begin to empty the classroom assuming a professor is a ‘no show.’ Running into the bowels of Hailstones with a cart full of books and papers, I noticed one student in attendance, the others having cleared only minutes earlier. I remember asking the student, ‘Why didn’t you leave with the others?’ Her reply, ‘You’ve always showed up for us, and I wanted to show up for you.’ That morning made my year!”


By: Brittany Wells | Staff Writer


Horoscopes

Aries: It’s hard to hold your tongue sometimes, especially if your earbud cords catch on a door handle. As nasty as it is, it isn’t an excuse to rage at all the kids with Airpods.

Taurus: It’s an all-or-nothing type of week. Either you’ll get all you need to do done and feel victorious, or you’ll procrastinate until the very last second and nearly die of stress.

Gemini: You know that meme about having to explain things to people like they’re five? Be prepared to do that this week whether you’re a student, a professor or other faculty.

Cancer: Expect the unexpected. It may feel like you’ve just been slammed into by a Xavier golf cart, but keep your cool and search for silver linings — like, hey, your tuition’s covered.

Leo: You’re a pretty generous soul, but even you can get worn out if you give with no returns. You always feed your betta fish — the least he could do is learn to do a barrel roll on command.

Virgo: Your emotions have two moods this week, and two moods only: A or F. Hopefully your grades will be a bit…calmer than that.

Libra: Getting a bunch of different news all at once might overwhelm you, so it helps to imagine yourself as the Sand Guardian, guardian of the sand, to keep cool.

Scorpio: You may notice that you’re not angry this week. You’re angery. Whether you choose to try and contain it or unleash it upon everything in sight is up to you.

Sagittarius: You don’t always get what you want when you want it, unfortunately, and that may come to a head this week — you want curly fries in the caf, but they only have straight ones.

Capricorn:  If you’re like the guy named Ron who sneezed in that one Vine and scared deer away and someone got upset, assert yourself. You sneezed, you’re not allowed to sneeze?

Aquarius:  It might be tricky to keep your words in check this week. The stars recommend smuggling a pet parrot (African greys are best) into your dorm for practicing conversations.

Pisces: Take careful note this week of who’s making you a better you and who isn’t. Don’t be afraid to make like a hair stylist and pull out them scissors, if it comes down to it.


This post was assembled by features Editor Soondos Mulla-Ossman.