“[Brainey Brains stem]” / A poem inspired by a doodle.
Brainey Brains stem
from form worming,
storming a way through intellectual
dirt, coming out
like cooked spaghetti.
Good Books are spineless
leeches lurking behind Eyes
that catch everything;
Eyes the most successful, accomplished
fisherman that don’t can’t won’t catch
a single fish, only tons and tons
of bricks, bones, and bodies.
Comic & Art
- Ice Skating
- South Korea
Aries: The haircut that will boost your career is Justin Timberlake’s ramen noodle curls.
Taurus: A chicken will cross the road in front of you. Soon, good luck will also cross your path.
Gemini: The FBI agent watching you will secretly curve your latest failed test.
Cancer: Your cause of death will be from touching the digusting gum under a desk.
Leo: The person who didn’t hold the door for you will be struck by lightning. Karma is real.
Virgo: Instead of getting a ticket for the Villanova game, you will somehow get a ticket for Village People.
Libra: You will receive an inconspicuous voicemail from Kylie Jenner asking you to be Stormi’s godparent.
Scorpio: Don’t cry over spilled milk, cry because you won’t be able to have chocolate milk for a week!
Sagittarius: The caf workers love you and will secretly give you some French toast sticks tomorrow morning.
Capricorn: You will twist your ankle at the SAC dance during “Twist and Shout.”
Aquarius: Your classes on Thursday will be cancelled because U-S-A, U-S-A, U-S-A.
Pisces: The next bag of chips you buy will be full of air, no chips in sight.
This post was assembled by Features Editor Monica Schweiger.