The Lighter Side – 11/2/20

Crystal economy, Wicca discrimination, Apocalypse Now, stripper skeletons

Libertarian presidential candidate Jo Jorgenson criticized children’s television network Nickelodeon for leaving her off of a graphic titled “Kids’ Vote,” describing the upcoming election. Jorgenson tweeted that the network is “complicit in indoctrinating our children” (Oct. 25). 

An Australian study found that inflatable tube-people deterred dingoes from attacking livestock, frightening the otherwise unflappable apex predators (Oct. 26). 

Two thieves were unpleasantly surprised after attempting to burgle an escape room in the Netherlands. After spending a considerable amount of time breaking into an antique safe, they discovered that the safe only held clues to other parts of the escape room (Oct. 27). 

A Texas woman was scolded by her homeowner’s association after posing a group of skeletons pole-dancing on her lawn as a Halloween decoration (Oct. 28). 

Photo courtesy of creative

Evangelical leader and possible cuck Jerry Falwell Jr. filed a lawsuit against Liberty University, the Christian college from which he recently resigned, saying that the school damaged his reputation (Oct. 29).

Pop singer Grimes came under fire after she announced before Halloween that her infant child enjoyed the horror film, Apocalypse Now. “He’s into radical art,” she said of the six-month-old (Oct. 30). 

A pregnant Florida woman went into labor, but stopped to fill out her ballot at a polling location before being driven to the hospital (Oct. 30). 

A U.K. man who stole two penguins from a zoo and then sold them on Facebook Marketplace was sentenced to nearly three years in prison (Oct. 30). 

The U.S. “crystal economy” has experienced a major boom in the weeks leading up to the election. Experts believe that the heightened interest in restorative rocks might be a result of anxiety surrounding COVID-19 and presidential prospects (Oct. 31). 

A U.K. pagan prison chaplain criticized lockdown practices’ effects on Wiccan practices, saying that the restrictions have limited witches’ ability to convene in covens on the spiritual day of Halloween (Oct. 31). 

The Biden campaign partnered with online video game Fortnite to create a custom map featuring slogans and issues from their campaign, including “No Malarkey Station” and mini-games surrounding eco-friendliness (Nov. 1).