Back Page 10/26/22

Horoscopes

Aries: “You look kinda halloweeny.” – Kim Kardashian 

Taurus: “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can look like a total slut, and no other girls can say anything about it.” – Cady Heron, Mean Girls

Gemini: “Oh, look! Another glorious morning. Makes me sick.” – Winifred Sanderson, Hocus Pocus 

Cancer: “Have a midnight jamboree…” – The Headless Horseman, The Legend of Sleepy Hollow 

Leo: “I’m a homicidal maniac. They look just like everyone else.” – Wednesday Addams, The Addams Family 

Virgo: “We came. We saw. We kicked its ass.” – Dr. Peter Venkman, Ghostbusters

Libra: “Do you believe in destiny?” — Dracula, Dracula 

Scorpio: “No, Please Don’t Kill Me, Mr. Ghostface. I Wanna Be In The Sequel!” — Tatum Riley From scream

Sagittarius: “Clothes Make A Statement. Costumes Tell A Story.” – Mason Cooley

Capricorn: “It’s As Much Fun To Scare As To Be Scared.” – Vincent Price

Aquarius: “Every Day Is Halloween, Isn’t It? For Some Of Us.” – Tim Burton

Pisces: “We Make Up Horrors To Help Us Cope With The Real Ones.” – Stephen King

  • Xavier Newswire's avatar

    Xavier Newswire

    Related Posts

    Xavier’s CCMS Partnership Raises Questions About Student Disappearances

    SATIRE By Joe Reardon, Staff Writer  Xavier University will welcome the Cincinnati College of Mortuary Science (CCMS) back to campus, returning the nation’s first mortuary school to the A.B. Cohen…

    Buc-ee’s Faced Against Beavercreek in the Court House

    SATIRE By Kayleb Blanton, Staff Writer  Buc-ee’s, a once beloved brand and fun sign to see on the highway, has recently come into controversy. The combination gas station and dried meat mall is coming…

    Discover more from Xavier Newswire

    Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

    Continue reading